Amateur Hour

It was 8:30, when Amanda and Lilah left. Lisa finished up the few dishes she had started, and dragged Gil out for an uneventful walk. When they returned to the rectory, Tuck was perched on the porch railing.

“Well, hello there,” Lisa greeted him, puffing a little from her vigorous return. The house was warm, and she was eager to get inside. “Are you off duty, already?”

Tuck bent to scratch Gil’s ears. “Lunch break,” he said, as Lisa unlocked and opened the door.

“So, you can stay for a few minutes?”

“That’s what I had in mind.” He followed her in and closed the door behind him, turning the deadbolt lock, as he did so. “Sorry—it’s a habit,” he said, when Lisa looked askance at him. He immediately unlocked the door again.

“Coffee, or something cold?”

“I’ll take an iced tea, if you have it.”

She got them each a bottle, and sat down next to him, on the sofa.

“I just thought I’d check in, and see what you and your spies uncovered, today.”

“Well, we found the deaconess, and her husband. 1975, Sophie and Richard Dixon. I suppose if you remember them, at all, it would be vaguely.”

“Very vaguely, but yeah, that sounds about right.”

“We also found out that Judge Lovejoy was considered to be stern but fair. Not much more, beyond that. We have the dates of his birth and death, but no details on the latter. Liam said he’d look into it, tomorrow.”

“You know, it occurred to me on the way over here, that Toni has a Branches account—it’s a genealogical site.”

“I’ve heard of it,” Lisa nodded.

“I called her up, and she said she’d be willing to give you permission to view her tree, if you want to.”

“That might help, a lot.”

“She said she’d send you all the log-in info, if you’ll give me your email address.”
Lisa got up and went to the pad she kept on the table, jotted the address on the top sheet, and tore it off. She handed it to Tuck, and resumed her seat, beside him.
“You know, there was also an indication, from the church records that some of the men in your family–”

“Met abrupt ends?” Tuck said, buttoning the paper into his top left pocket. “I know. My Granny Lovejoy used to tell me to be thankful I wasn’t a Lovejoy, by name.”
“So, she thought there was some kind of curse?”

“Thought?” Tuck smiled faintly. “She saw it, her whole life. So did I, for that matter. When I was a boy, it seemed like I was always attending a funeral for some Lovejoy uncle or cousin. Dreary, tight-lipped affairs.”

“Aren’t most funerals dreary?”

“Not on the Rawlings side of the family. We’re sad, of course, but we also tend to remember our loved ones with smiles and laughter. At Lovejoy funerals, the departed was rarely discussed, after the formal church tribute. Everyone was there, because they felt like they had to be, then everyone would bug out, as soon as they could. Is there anything sadder than that? I don’t think so.” Tuck sipped his tea, and shook his head, slowly. “So,” he said, eventually, “what else did you find out?”

“We found out that the entity in the basement seems to be a single one—not three—and it seems to be very passionate about the church. Janice caught it, on video.”

She reached for the laptop, cued the video up, and showed it to him. Tuck watched it three times.

“And, Kelly still hasn’t seen anything, at all?”

“She hasn’t mentioned it, if she has. Are you rethinking her safety? Because, I am.”

“Well, for all we know, this thing showed up for you. Janice’s presence might have just been incidental. None of these ghosts seem to give a tinker’s damn about who else sees them, as long as they can put on a show, for you.”

“You’re forgetting your own sighting, in the church. I wasn’t there, for that one.”

“You were on the premises, but I get your point. That show might have been for me, yes. But, I’m a Lovejoy descendant. If those soldiers were actually lynched by an ancestor of mine, that might explain it.”

“I’m having trouble seeing it, though. If Judge Lovejoy was truly as fair as he was purported to be…”

“Emotions ran very high, back then. It was a time of snap judgments, overkill, and visceral hatred for the enemy. Probably because the enemy was your former neighbor, your best school chum, or even your own brother. Nothing fuels hatred, like a sense of betrayal. If I’m not mistaken, I have ancestors that fought on both sides of the Civil War.”

“Rawlings versus Lovejoy?”

“No. Lovejoy versus Lovejoy. My Rawlings ancestors didn’t arrive here, until after the war. I found that out, from Toni. She never cared a lot for research, in school, but she’s turning into a genealogy fiend.” He laughed a little, at this. “How has the rectory been, since you scattered your statues around?” he nodded toward the on in the center of the coffee table.

“Very quiet. Maybe they work, in here,” Lisa shrugged.

“Maybe. I hope so. But, call me, if things get nuts in here, again. You have my personal number. I expect you to use it. But for now, I’ve got to get back at it. Those graffiti artists and prowlers aren’t going to catch themselves.”

Lisa rose, when he did, and walked him to the door.
“Be safe, Tuck,” she said, and on an impulse, gave him a peck on the cheek.

“Well, now I’m armored against anything,” he grinned. “But I’ll watch my step. Good night, Lisa.”

Halloween dawned clear and cold. At least, to Lisa, 48 degrees was nippy. While she shivered in her long coat, Gil was full of beans and ready to run. She released him almost as soon as they were facing the direction they usually walked, and he shot away from her, into his beloved woods. The light breeze made her pull her watch cap lower, around her ears. She didn’t care what anyone else thought; she was resolved to buy a pair of earmuffs.

She cupped her hands around her ceramic mug, feeling the warmth of her coffee, through her gloves. She was sorry for the loss of the travel mug, but today was a good day for the ceramic—if she could avoid spilling it on herself. In the near distance, Gil began to bark, presumably at a squirrel, raccoon, or some hapless opossum that was trying to mind its own business.

A minivan loaded with five women pulled into the drive, and made its way slowly toward her, headlights still on, though the sun was rising. Amanda was behind the wheel. When they were next to Lisa, she rolled the window down, and greeted her, with a smile.

“You’re here early,” Lisa observed, returning the smile.

“We like to clear up the area, and set up what we can, in advance,” Amanda replied.

“You brought… brooms?” Lisa laughed. All the women in the car chuckled, too.

“Symbolic, but they work well, too. Have you changed your mind about joining us?”

“I think the weather might be a little too chilly for me.”

“I have an extra woolen cloak you could wear. Or, you could stick to your coat. We will have a fire going, all the while. Give it some thought.”

“I’ll think about it,” Lisa said, doubting she really would, but being polite.

“Good. Now, I guess we’d better get started.”

“Have fun, then. And, if you run across my vicious dog, don’t let him lick you, to death.”

“That sweet pup we met, yesterday?”

“That would be the one. Really, though, I doubt you would see him. He sticks pretty close to me. If you do, he’s a sucker for sweet talk and ear scritches,” Lisa grinned.

They were a merry bunch, Lisa thought, as they drove off. For all the world, they reminded her of ladies setting up a church picnic. In their minds, she supposed they were. They were going to freeze their butts off tonight, she was sure. She didn’t envy them, but Amanda had been right about one thing, she was more than a little curious.

She turned toward the pines. “Gillie!” she shouted. “Come on, Gil—it’s cold, out here!”

In a moment, she could hear him galumphing toward her, seventy pounds of stealth and brains. He was as happy to see her as he had been to run away from her, a few minutes ago. She decided to trust him off the leash, since she didn’t feel like risking a coffee spill. Gil wasn’t an intellectual sort, but did have the good sense to stay at her side, until they were back in the warm confines of the house.
Lisa refilled her coffee, and sat down at the table, to check her email. At the very top was a message from ToniGotsGoats at gmail. She opened it to find that Toni was as good as her word. Beneath a brief, friendly note was the information Lisa would need to view Toni’s family tree, on Branches.

She had just decided to look into it, later, when her phone rang.

“You up?” Liam asked.

“Obviously, since I answered. What’s up?”

“Not much. I just thought it would be a good idea to get an early start, today. Are you ready for us?”

“Depends. Are you bringing donuts, again?”

“Sure, unless you’d rather have something else. I can whip by Mickey D’s.”

“No, donuts are fine, and you don’t have to bring those. I was just messing with you.”

“Well, I have to feed Janice in the morning. She’s not fit to deal with, if I don’t.”

“That’s a lie!” Lisa heard Janice protest.

“I agree with her,” Lisa said. “You’re the one who can’t get your feet under you, without a bowl of Lucky Charms.”

“More like Bran Flakes, these days,” Liam sighed. “Speaking of flakes, do you think it would be okay if I brought Spike? I think he was lonely, yesterday. He wouldn’t let us alone, when we got back, last night.”

“I guess so. Gil seems to get along okay with other dogs, so far. I wouldn’t mind seeing Spike.”

“Okay. We’ll be over, in a bit.”

Spike was a buff colored Spaniel, whose usual cocky attitude deserted him, at the sight of the larger dog. Initially, he cowered against Liam’s leg, growling softly, but showing no teeth. After some mutual sniffing, however, he decided Gil was no threat, despite his size. In no time, he was sacked out on the floor by Janice’s feet, looking calm and comfortable.

“If this is bad, don’t blame me,” Lisa said, pouring coffee for them out of her new percolator.

“You made it on the stove,” Janice chuckled, pleased. “I’m sure it’s excellent.”

“How are your shoes, this morning?” It slipped out, before Lisa could stop it.

Janice crowed, with laughter. “High and dry, thank you,” she said. “I’ve taken to putting them out of Spike’s reach, at night. He hasn’t even had a chance to moisten this pair. I’ve given up on trying to figure out why he does it, and now I’m just opting for prevention. Have you talked to your cute deputy, since yesterday morning?”

Lisa blushed slightly. “I talked to him, last night. He dropped by, on his lunch break.” She sat down on the sofa, next to Janice.

“Do tell,” Janice said, archly.

“Not much to tell. I showed him the video, told him about the stuff we’d found out, and he’s gotten his daughter to give me access to their family tree.”

“How does that help?” Liam asked, reaching for a donut.

“I don’t know that it does, except that he mentioned he’d had ancestors on both sides of the Civil War. And, maybe there’s something more concrete about Lovejoy’s death. The more I think about it, the more I think that entity that we encountered yesterday might have been him.”

Janice and Liam were both silent for a moment at this surmise, on Lisa’s part.

“What makes you think that?” Liam finally asked.

“It was a single being. It was male. It had a deep connection to the church.” Lisa shrugged.

“Couldn’t it have been the shade of some outraged rector?” Liam asked.

“Sure, but ministers come and go. I don’t think any of them would have formed such a bond with the site. Lovejoy was a founder, and he would have taken that role, very seriously. I’m sure he poured money into it, and back in those days, it was very likely that he hammered a few nails, as well,” Lisa said.

“It fits,” Janice nodded. “That creature yesterday was so territorial. This is great coffee, by the way, Lisa.”

“Thanks. I’m really starting to like that percolator.”

“So, should I concentrate on Lovejoy today, or the Dixons?” Liam asked.

“The Dixons, I think,” Lisa said. “I might be able to research Lovejoy a bit, myself, on Toni’s family tree. We know far less about the Dixons, anyway. The house has been quiet, for the last couple of nights, but you never know what’s going to happen around here.”

“I brought my own laptop, today,” Janice said. “I can help whoever needs me.”

“Why don’t you come with me today, Janice?” Liam suggested. “One of us can look into the pastor, and the other can take his wife. We’ll drop Spike off, on the way to the library.”

“You can leave him here,” Lisa suggested. “I can walk him, when I take Gil. I won’t let him off his leash, though.”

“I’m sure he’d prefer that, to being alone in the motel room,” Liam said, “but we didn’t bring him for you to babysit.”

“I don’t mind. He’s a good boy, and he seems okay with Gil.”

Lisa found herself reluctant, for some reason, to attack the task she’d set for herself. She felt a little like she was snooping, as she opened the Branches genealogy site, and logged into Toni’s account.

When she had navigated her way to the proper tree, she was amazed and intimidated by the sheer size of the tree, in overview. She had no idea how the application worked, so as an experiment, she typed Tuck’s name into the search box. This took her immediately to the entry of his name, date of birth, parents names, and the name of his wife and daughter.

Clicking on the picture of Tuck took her to another three pages with all of the media content available about him. There was a lot of it, spanning the thirty years of his service to the county. Through copied news clippings, she found that Tuck had been given various awards, wounded twice in the line of duty, and had been a member of the local Moose lodge, for fifteen years.

Farther down on the page were earlier clippings. It appeared that Tuck had been a Western Pleasure champ, in his early teens, as well as a Junior Rodeo calf roper. Well, that would explain how he knew Buckshot had all the moves of a cow pony, she supposed.

However, she wasn’t here to research Tuck, compelling as he might be as a subject. She supposed, lacking a first name, she would have to trace the Judge backward, from Tuck’s mother.

It didn’t take very long, as she wasn’t interested in the particulars of Tuck’s mother, his grandfather Lovejoy, or his great grandfather, though a peep at the death dates of the men confirmed that neither of them had reached the age of thirty.

Gerald Thomas Lovejoy was a different story. He had lived to the ripe old age of seventy, before he passed away. Even that seemed kind of young to Lisa, but she supposed for the time period in which he had lived, it wasn’t. Lisa clicked on Lovejoy’s name, and found his media. There weren’t as many notations as in Tuck’s listing, but there were enough to establish that he had indeed been a pillar of the community. It was a letdown.

This information told her nothing. Even his obituary was vague—it was ruled “death by misadventure”. There had been a coroner’s inquiry, as he had died unattended. The brief findings were pretty cut and dried. Then, something snagged her eye. The address under “place of death” was her own address. Rather, it was the church’s address. The rectory hadn’t been built until long after the Judge had passed.

Lisa clicked on the next page. The first clipping to greet her was: “Man Perishes in Church Fire”.

‘Bainbridge– August 23, 1900

Fire claimed the life of County Judge Gerald T. Lovejoy on the evening of August 22, 1900, at a local church, authorities say. The unexplained blaze broke out in the sanctuary of St. Brigid’s Episcopal church, consuming the building and taking the life of Judge Lovejoy, who died of smoke asphyxia while apparently taking refuge in the basement…’

There was more, but it was more uncertainty. No one had any idea what caused the fire. No one knew why Lovejoy had been there, except that one person remarked that it wasn’t uncommon for him to show up, at any hour. The only thing the article did was cement the notion in Lisa’s mind that the spook in the basement was Lovejoy.

Lisa sighed, and backed out of the pages, to the original listing, in the tree. For the hell of it, she clicked on the link to Lovejoy’s father. From the looks of it, Gerald Lovejoy had been the eldest son, with three sisters and two step-brothers, gained in his father’s remarriage after the death of his mother. The new stepmother had brought her sons from Connecticut, in 1852.

Old Lovejoy had died shortly after this marriage, leaving Gerald and his stepmother to rear the rest of the family. Lisa wondered how that had worked out, for them. Probably not very harmoniously. Gerald would have been in his late teens, at the time, and responsible for not only his own younger sisters, but for his Yankee stepmother and her sons, as well.

She doubted there would be anything interesting on either of the sons. Still, she opened the page of the firstborn, Jeremiah. To her surprise, she found that “Jem” as he had been called, had taken his stepfather’s name, but had served in the Union Army. Like many a fallen soldier in his time, he was listed as missing, presumed dead.

Well, Lisa reflected, that must have burned Gerald’s biscuits. Just to think of what might have happened, if the boy had lived, to return home…

Suddenly, she sat bolt upright, in her chair. No way, she thought. She grabbed her mouse, and clicked on the next page. There was the tintype of a young Union Army soldier, unsmiling, in his new uniform. It wasn’t the Sergeant, but it was the shorter of the two men who had been with him.

Lisa jumped up and went into the front bedroom. It didn’t take long to locate her printer, but it seemed like it took forever to get it set up and paired with her WiFi. When it was finally all hooked up, she printed the page with the tintype, and the page with the military intake record.

“Jeremiah Lovejoy,” she muttered, looking down at the freshly printed pages. “Is this what you want? For someone to know who you were? That your own stepbrother might have been responsible for your death?”

Lisa decided that she needed some fresh air, and, leaving the dogs to their own devices, she slipped out and walked toward the church, wondering idly if Kelly had arrived yet.

Kelly was just coming out of the vestment room, with another of her inevitable cages, when Lisa met her. “Only four today,” Kelly held the cage aloft, in greeting. “I think we’re winning the war.”

“Just what do you do with them, anyway?” Lisa asked, with a grimace.

“You don’t really want to know,” Kelly said. “Trust me.”

“You’re probably right, about that. Forget I asked.

“I’ve seen my sister and her crew skulking around back,” Kelly continued. “I can only take that to mean that you’ve given them permission to use the grotto.”

“I gave them permission to use my property to get to it. I’m not sure that the grotto is actually on my land.”

“Semantics. Anyway, I’m glad that you hit it off, with her. I see that you bought at least one of her statues.” Kelly indicated the black angel, with a nod.

“That reminds me—I wanted to move that.”

“Maybe so. Mandy told me about the video. She didn’t figure you’d mind.”

“I don’t. You already know about the shenanigans that go on around here.”

“I’d ask to see it, but I don’t want to put ideas into my own head.”

“I don’t blame you,” Lisa said, and moved to the altar, to pick up the angel. “I guess I’ll just put this in the narthex. No sense in pissing him off, more. So, you’ve seen absolutely nothing, Kelly?”

“Just rats, and they’re starting to dwindle. By next week, it’ll be safe enough to let cleaners in. I can tell you right now, everything in that vestment room has to go. There’s nothing in there that can be salvaged.”

“I can’t see why I’d want to, anyway. As long as the empty room can be used, that’s all I care about. You’ve really done an amazing job, so far.”

“Thank you. I think this building has set a record, for me. I forget what the actual total is, but it’s more than fifty.”

“Did you find any nests, with babies?”

“Four. I imagine I’ll find a couple more, before I’m done. I wasn’t actively looking for the ones I found; I just kind of stumbled across them.”

“Nice,” Lisa grimaced again.

“They’re just pinkies. Helpless and harmless, really. I have a friend who has a ball python. I save the pinkies for him to freeze and feed his snake.”

“Nice to know they’re not going to waste, I guess,” Lisa replied, with a doubtful face.

Kelly laughed at her expression. “It’s the circle of life, Lisa.”

They were interrupted by a the footsteps of a man, coming toward them. At the sight of Tuck, Lisa suddenly felt nervous, and for once she wished he hadn’t stopped by. She knew she’d have to tell him sooner or later about her discoveries on Toni’s family tree, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to do it, right now.

“Well, how are you today, Tuck?” Kelly asked. “You’re becoming quite a regular, around here.”

“Shut up, Kelly,” he smiled. “I thought I’d invite you two to lunch, but now I’m reconsidering asking you.”

“Can’t, anyway,” Kelly shrugged. “I have places to go and people to annoy.”

“I believe that. How about you, Lisa? We could go back to Ken’s, so I can have breakfast while you have lunch. You can tell me all about the strange goings on, at the back of your property.”

“So,” Tuck began, firing up his Jeep, “did I spot Mandy’s gang trooping up and down the hill, out back?”

“You did. I told them they could use my property to access the grotto.”

“I figured they wouldn’t be doing it, without your permission.”

“You disapprove?”

“Would it matter? No, I don’t. It’s just another Halloween party. I doubt it’ll get as rowdy as some others, tonight.”

“You’ll be extra careful, I hope.”

He smiled over at her, and patted her hand. “I will,” he said. “I’ll even have a partner, tonight. On Halloween, it’s all hands to the pump, and they double up as many deputies as they can. There’s always a little trouble, but it’s not New York City trouble. Did you get the chance to look at Toni’s tree, yet?”

And, just like that, he changed the subject to the very one she wanted to avoid. For an instant, Lisa considered lying.

“Yes,” she said. “It’s amazing, how extensive it is. How long has she been working on it?”

“A few years, I guess.”

“Have you seen it?”

“I have, and I feel like you’re stalling.”

“I am,” Lisa admitted. “I dug around and found out that Judge Lovejoy had a stepbrother who served in the Union Army.” There. It was mostly out.

“He wasn’t the only one. Some Lovejoys who were closer kin than that, took opposite sides. It was all too common a thing.”

“Private Jeremiah Lovejoy’s last status was ‘missing, presumed dead’.”

“You can’t be thinking he was one of the church arsonists.” He shot her an incredulous look, before returning his eyes to the road. “I mean, I’m not defending anyone, here, but it really seems like a broad coincidence.”

“But, does it?” Lisa asked. “It’s not so much a coincidence that he might have been sent into Georgia. Coincidence mostly comes into play when you consider his being sent to an area that he probably knew like the back of his hand. Anyway, if they didn’t happen, we wouldn’t have the word.”

“Well, I can’t argue with that statement,” Tuck smiled slightly, and turned into Ken’s parking lot.